Since you're probably the principal breadwinner, you should consider the effect of your job search on your family, particularly your wife. The decision you make, especially if it involves a geographic move, can have a dramatic effect on her life. It could be a threat to all she holds most dear - your home, her friends, her career and community involvements. She may not volunteer her concerns, recognizing the tremendous pressure you're under. Tell her you understand and appreciate her support.
You may have a strong tendency to keep things to yourself at this time. You're having a rough enough time as it is. To bring in your wife and children, you feel, might put limits on acceptable jobs, making things more difficult than they already are. This is a normal - even though shortsighted-attitude. Your fears can outdistance reality.
If you don't involve your wife, and your children - especially if they're teenagers, they may resist your accepting a job they perceive is adverse to their interests. Discuss fears with them all. Listen to them. Try to understand them. Usually it is particularly upsetting if a new job might require a move. You might explain: "The last thing I want to do is move to such and such. On the other hand, the implications of no job at all (or a much lower paying job) are even worse - on our living standard, plans for college, and so on." You may also want to make the point that looking for a job at this stage in your career is the hardest thing you've ever had to do.
Discuss all aspects of the situation with your family. Talk about the kind of job you want and the task of finding it. Ask for their support and opinions.
Your wife knows you better than anybody else does, and she often can provide constructive in sight. Some of her goals may be different from yours, and you should get the matter of goals out in the open and discuss them at the start. There would be nothing worse than for you to make a major decision without your wife's general agreement. Not only would this mean additional pressure on your marriage, but it could also be a major stumbling block to success in your new job.
You may have sheltered your wife from your financial situation - this, unfortunately, is more common than you might think. If you have, you no longer can conceal financial realities. And share this information with your children. If nothing else, to do so is to show respect and it will help to reinforce their support. They probably will volunteer to carry an additional load at home and realize that, at least for a time, they must give up costly things that they have been looking forward to - such as going to camp.
Unless you are unusual, your normal bills to maintain your current standard of living have consumed most of your family income. You all may be concerned about how to pay for next week's groceries. When you projected your expenses for a campaign of reasonable length, you probably assured yourself that while the immediate financial situation when you are unemployed would not be strong, it would be aided by reduced taxes, and possibly supplemented by severance pay and unemployment compensation. It is very much to your advantage that your family get a realistic picture of your finances, and you should all beware of the pressure that might build up to take the first job that comes along mainly for financial reasons, even though it isn't suitable. Your family can help you with certain details of job hunting. For example, if your wife types she can be a great asset.
You and your wife might talk with other couples who have been through the job-hunting process. What did they learn that was useful in coping? This is a time when you particularly need emotional outlets. Don't give up on your other personal interests (community activities, athletics, and hobbies). On the other hand, don't let them infringe on time you should be job hunting.
